RISC World

The Hugh Jampton Experience

He's back...herrrrrre'sssssss....Hugh!

So here we are again, at the start of another new beginning for RISCWorld, the start of volume 5, or a bit past the end of volume 4, take your pick. Anyway lets launch straight into...

The caption competition

Anyone who hasn't cancelled their subscription might remember this:

I can safely say that we have had an improved response over last time, so in no particular order we have...ta ta ta tata tata!

"Intel's new P5 Processor - They're currently having problems with cooling !"
John Crane

"Boy, these Pentiums sure run hot!"
Dennis Williams

"No it's not a cooling fan: quite the reverse. It's a wind turbine to power my RISC OS machine."
Chris Newman

"Do you hate noisy internal fans ? This could be the answer"
John Crane

Dennis Williams

"Stop! Don't turn the fan on just yet, I am frying my bacon and eggs."
Alan Shooter

"You think your internal fan's noisy, wait till we crank up this little beauty!"
John Crane

"Intel Outside!"
John Crane

Puzzled & angry wife from kitchen - "Darling, I think some yobo has stolen the extractor fan from above the cooker."
Chris Newman

"Fantastic!! We can now produce more hot air than the politicians."
Alan Shooter

However for careful use of understatement I have decided that we will have two joint winners, and they are:

"New Cooling fan for PC slightly larger than expected"

"Well, I ordered it on-line and I could possibly have typed the decimal points in the wrong places in the dimensions box....."
Chris Newman

Congratulations to all our competitors in what was a very close battle, the fact that we have joint winners should indicate the overall standard, so what can out captioneers come up with for this?

Send your entries to and you too could join the rich and famous (if you win the lottery).

Hugh's picture gallery

So it's time for the last bit of the magazine, my regular photo gallery...

so who remembers the RiscPC with a pizza oven in it? Here's the car it was delivered in.

At least this wasn't the driver.

Mind you with driving like that, this could easily be the result.

Still back in the real world RISC OS dealers are rushing to Wakefield.

They should be OK, as long as they aren't trying to catch the train.

And yet again it's time to end with the cute little doggy...

Hugh Jampton