RISC World

The Hugh Jampton Experience

Yes it's the man from SMERSH (Stupid

Hello and welcome to another low brow, and low budget, edition of the Hugh Jampton Experience!

The caption competition

Last issue we published this and asked readers to come up with a suitable caption...

The e-mail account was overflowing (it's only got 3K of capacity) within literally weeks. A couple had to be disqualified for being too funny, but rather rude, so the ones we can print include:

"Look Mom! I've invented the bicycle"
Harry Smith

"Harley Davidson show off their latest creation."
Kevin Wells

I'm having to bike to work since they wheel clamped my car"
Lol Simmonds

"Aaron has finally managed to buy himself a new mode of transport"
William McNee

(What???? Disqualify him at once - ED)

"Bill Gates demonstrates Microsoft's most up to date product yet"
John Peachy

"MicroSoft unveil new Software Troubleshooting Flying Squad!"

"Do you like my chopper? I won it in a caption competition."
Lol Simmonds

However our winner, for taking the chopper/axe them just a but further, and explaining the joke in the process is....

"The Original Raleigh Chopper - Handcrafted out of wood with an axe" (Axe = chopper you see !........)
John Crane

So congratulations to John, as usual there is no prize, apart from the universal acclaim of being a RISCWorld caption competition winner.

So here's this issue's picture, can anyone think of a suitable caption?

Send your entries to and you too could become famous in your own house.

Hugh's picture gallery

Moving quickly on lets fill up the rest of the space with some of the many pictures I get sent every month...

So lets start with food instructions for Americans...

And whilst we are on the subject of morons here's an ideal accessory for Sunday drivers...

...and something for the occasional computer user as well...

Of course it isn't just computer users who are stupid...

Here is a fun little optical illusion, try scrolling up and down whilst staring at this...

Meanwhile this little chap has found his own way of making optical illusions...

Hugh Jampton